May
Saturday 24 November 2012 photo 1/1
|
Random cpbild.
En uppsats jag skrev inatt till engelskan, kände att jag ville dela med mig utav den för att jag blev så nöjd med den :')
My journey torecovery<o:p></o:p>
I wasfourteen years old. Fourteen years old and I had just lost my mother. Mymother, who was the most important person in my life, I mean. I was a teenage girl;I had just started my life and my mother pasts away. I didn’t get it. Why me?What had I done to deserve this?<o:p></o:p>
That morning I was supposed to go to a confirmationcamp at 11am, I woke up at 10.30am and thought that it were strange that mymother had not woke me up. I put my clothes on and went in to the kitchen. Shewasn’t there, so I went in to her bedroom to see if she was still sleeping. No,she wasn’t there either, so I went in to the bathroom. And there she was, lyingon the bathroom floor. This is where my story begins. My story about how Irecovered after my mother’s death.
When I found my mother on the bathroom floor Ipanicked, I didn’t know what to do, but then something came up in my mind: Ishould try to take her pulse. I didn’t even think about it, I just straight putmy fingers against her neck, I couldn’t find her pulse in her neck, she waslaying in such a weird position so that I couldn’t access her artery. Her headwas lying between the wardrobe and the toilet. I tried to take her pulse in herwrist, at first I tried in her right hand, but since she was lying on her rightside it was hard for me to take her pulse on her right hand. But when I triedto take her pulse on her left hand I had to lift it up. As soon as I lifted herhand up I let go of it. She was so incredibly stiff. At that moment I knew forsure that she was gone, I knew that she was never going to get back in my life.Ever.
I realized that my mother had gave me our neighbor’snumber so I called her, I was panicking in the phone with her, she didn’t knewwho is was so I told her and she came right over to our house. When she sees mymother on the bathroom floor she called an ambulance, she told they were Ilived, my mother’s name, my name, my age. I remember I thought that the questionsthey asked her were really weird, but when I think of it now it all make sense.
I called my father but he didn’t answer so then Icalled my grandmother and se came straight away. After a while my father callsme back. I crying so bad in the phone with him, I told him that I found mymother on the bathroom floor and I thought that she was dead. I could hear himpanicking, and told me that he would be there as soon as he could. My fatherlived three miles away and it usually took him half an hour to drive to me butthis time it took half the time, he drove so fast. He had to make it sure thatI was okay.
I was a mess. A total mess. But what do you expectfrom a girl who just found her mother dead? I remembered that mother had washedclothes the night before so I went to hang the laundry, just because I wantedto think of something else. I couldn’t stand the thought that my mother wasn’twith me anymore. My grandmother told me that she could hang the laundry insteadof me and then I collapsed. I fell to the ground screaming and crying. I hatedmyself. Why couldn’t it be me instead of mother? I didn’t get it. I hatedmyself. Why didn’t I hear when she was falling to the ground? I could havehelped her.
That day I was just staring in to the wall, I didn’thear the people talking around me talking. If someone was asking me somethingthey had to say my name at least twice before I even reacted to that they weretalking to me. I couldn’t eat anything for months, I never became hungry and thatscared me a little. I locked myself in to my room and I only came out of therewhen I had to go to the toilet.
My dad was starting to really worry about me and hecalled a psychiatrist and talked. They came up with a time that I was going tovisit her and talk. The only thing I was worried about was going outside thehouse and talk to people again. After all the time I had spent in my room doingnothing but crying, reading, harming myself and talk to my friends on theinternet I had become scared of people, I now got <i style="font-size: large;">Social Anxiety and it is going to haunt me for the rest of my life.
<i style="font-size: large;">
There was a whole new world out there, it felt likeeverything had changed, like there is no way I was going to go out <i style="font-size: large;">there. Just the thought made me scared.But it went better than expected, I went to school three months later, but notfull time. I only went on the most important lessons. I went to thepsychiatrist for five months and after that I was better than ever but the lossof my mother still hurtled me, and it always will but I just have to learn tolive with it.
<i style="font-size: large;">
I couldn’t have made it without my father, my sistersand my wonderful friends. They are a very big part in my recovery, I’m nothingwithout them. They are my everything.
My mother isn’t coming back, I know that. But what Ialso know, is that she’s always with me, wherever I go, whatever I do, she willalways be with me. My own special guardian angel.<o:p></o:p>
<i style="font-size: large;"><i style="font-size: large;">
My journey torecovery<o:p></o:p>
I wasfourteen years old. Fourteen years old and I had just lost my mother. Mymother, who was the most important person in my life, I mean. I was a teenage girl;I had just started my life and my mother pasts away. I didn’t get it. Why me?What had I done to deserve this?<o:p></o:p>
That morning I was supposed to go to a confirmationcamp at 11am, I woke up at 10.30am and thought that it were strange that mymother had not woke me up. I put my clothes on and went in to the kitchen. Shewasn’t there, so I went in to her bedroom to see if she was still sleeping. No,she wasn’t there either, so I went in to the bathroom. And there she was, lyingon the bathroom floor. This is where my story begins. My story about how Irecovered after my mother’s death.
When I found my mother on the bathroom floor Ipanicked, I didn’t know what to do, but then something came up in my mind: Ishould try to take her pulse. I didn’t even think about it, I just straight putmy fingers against her neck, I couldn’t find her pulse in her neck, she waslaying in such a weird position so that I couldn’t access her artery. Her headwas lying between the wardrobe and the toilet. I tried to take her pulse in herwrist, at first I tried in her right hand, but since she was lying on her rightside it was hard for me to take her pulse on her right hand. But when I triedto take her pulse on her left hand I had to lift it up. As soon as I lifted herhand up I let go of it. She was so incredibly stiff. At that moment I knew forsure that she was gone, I knew that she was never going to get back in my life.Ever.
I realized that my mother had gave me our neighbor’snumber so I called her, I was panicking in the phone with her, she didn’t knewwho is was so I told her and she came right over to our house. When she sees mymother on the bathroom floor she called an ambulance, she told they were Ilived, my mother’s name, my name, my age. I remember I thought that the questionsthey asked her were really weird, but when I think of it now it all make sense.
I called my father but he didn’t answer so then Icalled my grandmother and se came straight away. After a while my father callsme back. I crying so bad in the phone with him, I told him that I found mymother on the bathroom floor and I thought that she was dead. I could hear himpanicking, and told me that he would be there as soon as he could. My fatherlived three miles away and it usually took him half an hour to drive to me butthis time it took half the time, he drove so fast. He had to make it sure thatI was okay.
I was a mess. A total mess. But what do you expectfrom a girl who just found her mother dead? I remembered that mother had washedclothes the night before so I went to hang the laundry, just because I wantedto think of something else. I couldn’t stand the thought that my mother wasn’twith me anymore. My grandmother told me that she could hang the laundry insteadof me and then I collapsed. I fell to the ground screaming and crying. I hatedmyself. Why couldn’t it be me instead of mother? I didn’t get it. I hatedmyself. Why didn’t I hear when she was falling to the ground? I could havehelped her.
That day I was just staring in to the wall, I didn’thear the people talking around me talking. If someone was asking me somethingthey had to say my name at least twice before I even reacted to that they weretalking to me. I couldn’t eat anything for months, I never became hungry and thatscared me a little. I locked myself in to my room and I only came out of therewhen I had to go to the toilet.
My dad was starting to really worry about me and hecalled a psychiatrist and talked. They came up with a time that I was going tovisit her and talk. The only thing I was worried about was going outside thehouse and talk to people again. After all the time I had spent in my room doingnothing but crying, reading, harming myself and talk to my friends on theinternet I had become scared of people, I now got <i style="font-size: large;">Social Anxiety and it is going to haunt me for the rest of my life.
<i style="font-size: large;">
There was a whole new world out there, it felt likeeverything had changed, like there is no way I was going to go out <i style="font-size: large;">there. Just the thought made me scared.But it went better than expected, I went to school three months later, but notfull time. I only went on the most important lessons. I went to thepsychiatrist for five months and after that I was better than ever but the lossof my mother still hurtled me, and it always will but I just have to learn tolive with it.
<i style="font-size: large;">
I couldn’t have made it without my father, my sistersand my wonderful friends. They are a very big part in my recovery, I’m nothingwithout them. They are my everything.
My mother isn’t coming back, I know that. But what Ialso know, is that she’s always with me, wherever I go, whatever I do, she willalways be with me. My own special guardian angel.<o:p></o:p>
Camera info
Comment the photo
2 comments on this photo
Directlink:
http://dayviews.com/cissibj0rk/511313362/
Visa toppen
Show footer