October
Friday 13 November 2009 photo 2/2
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It's so quiet here, dead quiet.
And here's this stillness, like a complete standstill.
I've always felt like I was standing on an edge looking down into this supermassive black hole
thas was threatening to drag me down into it's emptyness and darkness.
But what if I've been wrong all along?
What if this hole has been inside of me all this time and I've been looing inside myself without knowing it.
What if this darkness, this supermassive black hole, that I've been fighting not to be dragged into is me.
Or is it just my sickness, this product of all that I've lived through that is eating me from within and leaving me with nothing but this empty darkness?
And I can't explain how it makes me feel, 'cause I don't feel anyting at all.
And I can't tell you what I'm thinking, 'cause there are no thoughts.
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But I don't think this is a bad thing.
I think I might finally be on the verge to defeat this sickness that's been part of me for so long and made me feel like I've been held hostage.
Maybe now. finally...this will all make sense.
Even though, it takes a fool to remain sane ;)
But I've always been, and always will be kinda mental...in a good way though, it's just the way and who I am.
And I don't have a problem with me, I just wish being me could be a little easier.
And here's this stillness, like a complete standstill.
I've always felt like I was standing on an edge looking down into this supermassive black hole
thas was threatening to drag me down into it's emptyness and darkness.
But what if I've been wrong all along?
What if this hole has been inside of me all this time and I've been looing inside myself without knowing it.
What if this darkness, this supermassive black hole, that I've been fighting not to be dragged into is me.
Or is it just my sickness, this product of all that I've lived through that is eating me from within and leaving me with nothing but this empty darkness?
And I can't explain how it makes me feel, 'cause I don't feel anyting at all.
And I can't tell you what I'm thinking, 'cause there are no thoughts.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But I don't think this is a bad thing.
I think I might finally be on the verge to defeat this sickness that's been part of me for so long and made me feel like I've been held hostage.
Maybe now. finally...this will all make sense.
Even though, it takes a fool to remain sane ;)
But I've always been, and always will be kinda mental...in a good way though, it's just the way and who I am.
And I don't have a problem with me, I just wish being me could be a little easier.
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