July 2009
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you. Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is. Chuck
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies. Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird. Chuck Norris' pulse is measured on the richter scale.
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up. Chuck Norris CAN in fact 'raise the roof'. And he can do it with one hand.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes. Chuck Norris actually built the stairway to heaven.
Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough. Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops.
Chuck Norris's body temperature is 98.6 degrees... Celsius., The world's fastest car has 7 gears. 5, 6, and Chuck Norris.