If we take and jump back 11 years and about 10 hours ago from the now, I still at that time had a living brother. 31 january 1997 My Brother Lucas Tim Anders Anderson Was still alive , Actually I was sitting right next to him on his left side, holding his hand. Both he and I knew this was it, this was our very last hours maybe just minutes together, We was just sitting there talking about nothing, we were laughing becaouse I thought that if you are going to die you must do it with a smile. But as the time roll we knew that we must soon end our little chitchat to say goodbye . . Minutes to the death.. Me and Lucas started to talk more serious about our memories what he and I have done and so on. Still holding his hand we both said to each other that we would allways love each others and always be with each other in all times. And that look on his eyes when we said our last goodbye i huged him and kisst him on his forhead. Our eyes where glittering from tears, I felt his hand get colder and colder and then he whisperd several words to my ear. And these words I will never reveal to anyone ! so don´t ask for them. Now it was just a few minutes till i would have no brother by my side, I felt his hand dead cold gliding out from my hand, His eyes faded and became dark and life less, i slowly closed his eyes. And the last movement he did was with his mouth he formed it to the most beautiful but sadest of all smiles. Well I thought if he can smile to death then I can to I have done that since that day. This was the day that my heart roughly and hard was ripped in two. <<< - Jag vill att ni ska veta detta även om ni hört detta förut är det aldrig dumt o få höra det igen. En person försvinner aldrig, inte helt de lämnar oss aldrig så länge vi kommer ihåg de, Om en person inte får någon uppmärksamhet eller blir ihågkommen så dör denna personen tillslut han/hon försvinner från själva exsistensen även om det bara är mentalt eller fysiskt eller bägge. Så jag säger så här uppskatta o lev ut det livet ni har fått , kasta för helvete inte bort det ! Även om det är svårt i livet finns det alltid utvägar döden är visst så klart en utväg, men vad tjänar du på det ? vet du det ? jag vet då fan inte. Jag har varit på gränsen till döden ett bra antal gånger igenom döden men det e bara dit jag kommit. Livet är inte en chans enligt mig, det är ett val ! Chanser kommer o går i livet men kan välja o ta de eller kasta bort de. - >>> kom ihåg detta. I cant picture it but, It has been 11 years since that day, I can just say one thing. Wow I never thought that I would make it this far and long. But I know why a made it this far it is becaouse of a bunch of people. My friends<3. Tack för allt mina vänner om det inte var för er skulle jag till 100 % säkert inte andas här o nu. Jag älskar mer , djupare o starkare en vad ni kan tro det e fan sant jag kan inte lägga ett ord på hur mkt ni betyder för mig. Men tack jag älskar er som fan ! För utan er så är jag inte ett jävla skit.

Annons

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Anonymous Thu 31 Jan 2008 20:36

Jag finns här för dig :<3

Shinigami-kun Thu 31 Jan 2008 20:37

Tackar tackar Ellen du är underbar ska du veta <3

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July 2012