November
Wisdom
Anna
List of Good Reasons:
1. Boredom
2. Out of marshmallows
3. Yom Kippur
4. Dentist appointment
5. Needed one more body for elaborate corpse sculpture
6. They pissed me off in this dream I had
7. The store was too far away
8. Needed skin for new face hat
9. They might inconvenience me in the future
10. They sank my battleship
Knowlege is power
Power corrupts
Be evil, study hard.
" I am a deeply religious nonbeliever - this is a somewhat new kind of religion. "
"If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough. "
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. "
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort
Det normala definieras av avvikelser
Going to the car show and look at a mini-van is like going to a stripclub and look at the DJ.
"Stop sending people to kill me. We've already captured five of them, one of them with a bomb and another with a rifle... If you don't stop sending killers, I'll send one to Moscow, and I won't have to send a second." - Josip Tito till Stalin
The more I see the less I know for sure
Greed causes you to lose many things, but on the other hand, not wanting anything at all produces nothing
Trouble hates nothing as much as a smile.
Anger can be an expensive luxury.
Both your friend and your enemy think you will never die.
Do not be born good or handsome, but be born lucky.
I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.
Flattery makes friends and truth makes enemies.
He makes his home where the living is best.
He that can't endure the bad will not live to see the good.
He that is born to be hanged shall never be drowned.
Kill not the goose that lays the golden eggs.
It is a bold mouse that nestles in the cat's ear.
If you believe everything you read, better not read.
The closer you gets to light the greater your shadow becomes
May you wander over the face of the earth forever, never sleep twice in the same bed, never drink water twice from the same well, and never cross the same river twice in a year. Traditional Gypsy Curse
May your every wish be granted. Ancient Chinese Curse
Hello students, today I got lost on the road of life
You talk to much with your 'dont save me' and go away'. I thought I told you all your opinions were rejected.
Vash: How does it feel to kill passive human beings?
Stan: Do you feel anything when you burn your garbage?
Obelisk Student 2: You're not going anyway, buddy-boy...
Obelisk Student 3:...Except to Dr.Crowler's office! J
Jaden: (cries) No! Anyone but him...
Obelisk Student 1: Okay! We just have to deal with you ourselves then.
Jaden: Dr.Crowler! Help! Help!
Join the Army! Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives
Kyle: I wonder if I should bring some protection with me.
Jessica: Kyle, you're disgusting!
Kyle: What's disgusting about bringing my best shield? Yeesh...
Nall: This is going to be an interesting trip.
Teamwork: never having to take all the blame
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are you,
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head
I always try to go the extra mile at work, but my boss always finds me and brings me back
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts
A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too!
We should not shed tears
That is a surrender of the body to the heart
It is only proof
That we are beings that do not know
What to do with our hearts
I shall grant you any wish.
Anything you desire.
But in return
Give me your most prized possession.
I didn't fall asleep
I just had a dream in which I fell down some stairs.
-Don't you have any feelings toward your friends?
-... What kind of feelings?
-Worry for example... or dread of losing something... In other words... Love
- Is that something you need in order to survive?
Fear sucks. Because you never know when it will hit you. Sometimes it sneaks up behind you, giggling like your best girlfriend from 7th grade. Then it whacks you on the back of the head, takes you straight to your knees before you realize what hit you. Other times you can see it coming, just a dot on the horizon, but you're like a canary in a cage. All you can do is hang in there and hope it doesn't hit you so hard you get motion sickness and puke all over the newspapers.
After a long time of shooting at our heroes and the bad guys going to watch where they'd go and looking down a hole on the other side of the car:
Where did they go?
The garage
I'm out of ammo.
Yeah me too.
Where's the ammo?
The garage.
PERHAPS THE GREATEST FACULTY our minds possess is the ability to cope with pain. Classic
thinking teaches us of the four doors of the mind, which everyone moves through according to their need.
First is the door of sleep. Sleep offers us a retreat from the world and all its pain. Sleep marks passing
time, giving us distance from the things that have hurt us. When a person is wounded they will often fall
unconscious. Similarly, someone who hears traumatic news will often swoon or faint. This is the mind's
way of protecting itself from pain by stepping through the first door.
Second is the door of forgetting. Some wounds are too deep to heal, or too deep to heal quickly. In
addition, many memories are simply painful, and there is no healing to be done. The saying "time heals all
wounds" is false. Time heals most wounds. The rest are hidden behind this door.
Third is the door of madness. There are times when the mind is dealt such a blow it hides itself in insanity.
While this may not seem beneficial, it is. There are times when reality is nothing but pain, and to escape
that pain the mind must leave reality behind.
Last is the door of death. The final resort. Nothing can hurt us after we are dead, or so we have been
told.
Wish I was a Kellogg's Cornflake
Floatin' in my bowl takin' movies,
Relaxin' awhile, livin' in style,
Talkin' to a raisin who 'casion'ly plays LA,
Casually glancing at his toupee.
Wish I was an English muffin
'Bout to make the most out of a toaster.
Saker lärare hatar med första dagen på terminen
Att behöva vänja sig vid den nya, kliande skottsäkra västen.
För åttonde året i rad får man en elev som heter Inge Kön.
Känna sig gammal efter att ha sett hur mycket fostren i glasflaskorna växt.
Upptäcka att polisen använt all krita till att märka upp liken på trottoaren utanför.
Att behöva träffa elever som fick specialundervisning i åttan... specialundervisning i baksätet av bilen... specialundervisning på fotbollsplanen... specialundervising i bastun...
Av gammal vana ropar eleverna ens namn under uppropet.
Trots att man tränat hela sommaren får man ändå stryk i armbrytning av tjejernas gympalärare.
Tvingas lyssna på elever som läser listor över "Saker jag hatar med första dagen på terminen", som de hittat på någon fånig hemsida.
Hur fan ska jag veta det? Jag strejkar!!!
Nya elever från Klippan som alltid bär trenchcoats.
Elever som lämnar in uppsatser på ämnet "Människor jag sköt under sommarlovet".
Försöka prata med en annan lärare under korseld.
Elever som hela tiden frågar om de kan få en tiominuters "ammunitions-rast".
Försöka få elever att koncentrera sig på standardprovet, när det enda de tänker på är "mandomsprovet".
Att behöva sudda ut 500 "Den nya läraren suger" från svarta tavlan.
Att behöva använda sig av tum och miles under mattelektionen.
Det som var en kemisal i början av lektionen, är nu en modell av Tjernobyl.
Den enda gången eleverna lyssnar under naturkunskapen är när man nämner "svampar" eller "gräs".
Varför är studerande bättre än sex
10.
Du kan oftast hitta någon att göra det med.
9.
Om du blir trött kan du sluta, ta en paus och komma tillbaka och fortsätta där du slutade sist.
8.
Du kan sluta tidigt, utan några som helst ångestkänslor, eller skamsenhet.
7.
Då du öppnar en bok behöver du inte fundera på om den har öppnats förut.
6.
Lite kaffe och du kan hålla på hela natten.
5.
Om du inte avslutar ett kapitel får du inte ett rykte som boktjusare.
4.
Du kan göra det, äta och se på TV på samma gång.
3.
Du skäms inte om dina föräldrar kommer på dig när du gör det.
2.
Du behöver inte ställa ner din öl för att göra det.
1.
Om du inte är säker på vad du gör kan du fråga din rumskompis om hjälp.
After I read Snow White I tried to bite an apple. But after I read Frog Prince I didn't want to kiss a frog.
A purely evil soul...
...Cannot be controlled by anyone.
All living things are evil in some way.
Down the long path of destruction, of Death...
What awaits at the end is light...
...And at the same time, darkness.
Pistols are surprisingly inaccurate. They’re most effektive between 6 and 8 meters. Any more than that and it’s just useful for initimidation
FJORTISEN (Homo Sapiens Fjorticus)
Är ett flocklevande djur som ofta syns vid skymning kring McDonalds, ibland även sybillagrillar, i stora gäng. Hanarna känns igen på sitt tuppliknande läte och rödprickiga ansikte där jakten på den mest IQ-befriade tjejen börjar med att spela upp sin senaste ringsignal på mobilen. Honorna känns igen på sina översminkade, konstgjorda utseenden och rosa stringtros
som hänger strax under armhålorna. Byxor i barnstorlekar är ofta vanligt. Fjortisen kan upplevas som ett mycket störande djur då de under sin vandring genom samhället kan utstöta sig höga parningsläten. Ofta i form av svordomar så som t.ex: Tönt. Hora osv. Antalet av dessa djur har ökat markant på senare tid vilket har lett till en het diskussion om det är möjligt att börja skjuta delar av populationen.
Everyone likes children, so when a person says, 'I LIKE CHILDREN,' it isn't really that creepy, but when we get into specifics like, 'I LIKE 10 YEAR OLDS,' that's where we draw the line.
Folk som åker i fängelse är inte bara förbrytare - de är definitionsmässigt förbrytare som har misslyckats.
Det finns fyra slags mord; brottsliga, ursäktliga, rättvisa och berömvärda. Denna klassificering tjänar juristerna. För de mördade är den likgiltig.
-hahaha that's very cute. You look like a match selling girl.
- Ahh, the ones that light houses on fire right?
- No.
- Hey, what are you doing?
- Shh, I'm up to somthing big
- Tailing cops inside a police station?
- ....
"The power of accurate observation is often
called cynicism by those who have not got it."
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
"You want sympathy? You'll find it between "shit" and "syphilis" in the dictionary."
The most honorable way for a vampire to die is to go sky diving, land on a cow, fall off the cow, and impale himself on the wooden fencepost.
1. Boredom
2. Out of marshmallows
3. Yom Kippur
4. Dentist appointment
5. Needed one more body for elaborate corpse sculpture
6. They pissed me off in this dream I had
7. The store was too far away
8. Needed skin for new face hat
9. They might inconvenience me in the future
10. They sank my battleship
Knowlege is power
Power corrupts
Be evil, study hard.
" I am a deeply religious nonbeliever - this is a somewhat new kind of religion. "
"If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough. "
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. "
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort
Det normala definieras av avvikelser
Going to the car show and look at a mini-van is like going to a stripclub and look at the DJ.
"Stop sending people to kill me. We've already captured five of them, one of them with a bomb and another with a rifle... If you don't stop sending killers, I'll send one to Moscow, and I won't have to send a second." - Josip Tito till Stalin
The more I see the less I know for sure
Greed causes you to lose many things, but on the other hand, not wanting anything at all produces nothing
Trouble hates nothing as much as a smile.
Anger can be an expensive luxury.
Both your friend and your enemy think you will never die.
Do not be born good or handsome, but be born lucky.
I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.
Flattery makes friends and truth makes enemies.
He makes his home where the living is best.
He that can't endure the bad will not live to see the good.
He that is born to be hanged shall never be drowned.
Kill not the goose that lays the golden eggs.
It is a bold mouse that nestles in the cat's ear.
If you believe everything you read, better not read.
The closer you gets to light the greater your shadow becomes
May you wander over the face of the earth forever, never sleep twice in the same bed, never drink water twice from the same well, and never cross the same river twice in a year. Traditional Gypsy Curse
May your every wish be granted. Ancient Chinese Curse
Hello students, today I got lost on the road of life
You talk to much with your 'dont save me' and go away'. I thought I told you all your opinions were rejected.
Vash: How does it feel to kill passive human beings?
Stan: Do you feel anything when you burn your garbage?
Obelisk Student 2: You're not going anyway, buddy-boy...
Obelisk Student 3:...Except to Dr.Crowler's office! J
Jaden: (cries) No! Anyone but him...
Obelisk Student 1: Okay! We just have to deal with you ourselves then.
Jaden: Dr.Crowler! Help! Help!
Join the Army! Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives
Kyle: I wonder if I should bring some protection with me.
Jessica: Kyle, you're disgusting!
Kyle: What's disgusting about bringing my best shield? Yeesh...
Nall: This is going to be an interesting trip.
Teamwork: never having to take all the blame
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are you,
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head
I always try to go the extra mile at work, but my boss always finds me and brings me back
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts
A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too!
We should not shed tears
That is a surrender of the body to the heart
It is only proof
That we are beings that do not know
What to do with our hearts
I shall grant you any wish.
Anything you desire.
But in return
Give me your most prized possession.
I didn't fall asleep
I just had a dream in which I fell down some stairs.
-Don't you have any feelings toward your friends?
-... What kind of feelings?
-Worry for example... or dread of losing something... In other words... Love
- Is that something you need in order to survive?
Fear sucks. Because you never know when it will hit you. Sometimes it sneaks up behind you, giggling like your best girlfriend from 7th grade. Then it whacks you on the back of the head, takes you straight to your knees before you realize what hit you. Other times you can see it coming, just a dot on the horizon, but you're like a canary in a cage. All you can do is hang in there and hope it doesn't hit you so hard you get motion sickness and puke all over the newspapers.
After a long time of shooting at our heroes and the bad guys going to watch where they'd go and looking down a hole on the other side of the car:
Where did they go?
The garage
I'm out of ammo.
Yeah me too.
Where's the ammo?
The garage.
PERHAPS THE GREATEST FACULTY our minds possess is the ability to cope with pain. Classic
thinking teaches us of the four doors of the mind, which everyone moves through according to their need.
First is the door of sleep. Sleep offers us a retreat from the world and all its pain. Sleep marks passing
time, giving us distance from the things that have hurt us. When a person is wounded they will often fall
unconscious. Similarly, someone who hears traumatic news will often swoon or faint. This is the mind's
way of protecting itself from pain by stepping through the first door.
Second is the door of forgetting. Some wounds are too deep to heal, or too deep to heal quickly. In
addition, many memories are simply painful, and there is no healing to be done. The saying "time heals all
wounds" is false. Time heals most wounds. The rest are hidden behind this door.
Third is the door of madness. There are times when the mind is dealt such a blow it hides itself in insanity.
While this may not seem beneficial, it is. There are times when reality is nothing but pain, and to escape
that pain the mind must leave reality behind.
Last is the door of death. The final resort. Nothing can hurt us after we are dead, or so we have been
told.
Wish I was a Kellogg's Cornflake
Floatin' in my bowl takin' movies,
Relaxin' awhile, livin' in style,
Talkin' to a raisin who 'casion'ly plays LA,
Casually glancing at his toupee.
Wish I was an English muffin
'Bout to make the most out of a toaster.
Saker lärare hatar med första dagen på terminen
Att behöva vänja sig vid den nya, kliande skottsäkra västen.
För åttonde året i rad får man en elev som heter Inge Kön.
Känna sig gammal efter att ha sett hur mycket fostren i glasflaskorna växt.
Upptäcka att polisen använt all krita till att märka upp liken på trottoaren utanför.
Att behöva träffa elever som fick specialundervisning i åttan... specialundervisning i baksätet av bilen... specialundervisning på fotbollsplanen... specialundervising i bastun...
Av gammal vana ropar eleverna ens namn under uppropet.
Trots att man tränat hela sommaren får man ändå stryk i armbrytning av tjejernas gympalärare.
Tvingas lyssna på elever som läser listor över "Saker jag hatar med första dagen på terminen", som de hittat på någon fånig hemsida.
Hur fan ska jag veta det? Jag strejkar!!!
Nya elever från Klippan som alltid bär trenchcoats.
Elever som lämnar in uppsatser på ämnet "Människor jag sköt under sommarlovet".
Försöka prata med en annan lärare under korseld.
Elever som hela tiden frågar om de kan få en tiominuters "ammunitions-rast".
Försöka få elever att koncentrera sig på standardprovet, när det enda de tänker på är "mandomsprovet".
Att behöva sudda ut 500 "Den nya läraren suger" från svarta tavlan.
Att behöva använda sig av tum och miles under mattelektionen.
Det som var en kemisal i början av lektionen, är nu en modell av Tjernobyl.
Den enda gången eleverna lyssnar under naturkunskapen är när man nämner "svampar" eller "gräs".
Varför är studerande bättre än sex
10.
Du kan oftast hitta någon att göra det med.
9.
Om du blir trött kan du sluta, ta en paus och komma tillbaka och fortsätta där du slutade sist.
8.
Du kan sluta tidigt, utan några som helst ångestkänslor, eller skamsenhet.
7.
Då du öppnar en bok behöver du inte fundera på om den har öppnats förut.
6.
Lite kaffe och du kan hålla på hela natten.
5.
Om du inte avslutar ett kapitel får du inte ett rykte som boktjusare.
4.
Du kan göra det, äta och se på TV på samma gång.
3.
Du skäms inte om dina föräldrar kommer på dig när du gör det.
2.
Du behöver inte ställa ner din öl för att göra det.
1.
Om du inte är säker på vad du gör kan du fråga din rumskompis om hjälp.
After I read Snow White I tried to bite an apple. But after I read Frog Prince I didn't want to kiss a frog.
A purely evil soul...
...Cannot be controlled by anyone.
All living things are evil in some way.
Down the long path of destruction, of Death...
What awaits at the end is light...
...And at the same time, darkness.
Pistols are surprisingly inaccurate. They’re most effektive between 6 and 8 meters. Any more than that and it’s just useful for initimidation
FJORTISEN (Homo Sapiens Fjorticus)
Är ett flocklevande djur som ofta syns vid skymning kring McDonalds, ibland även sybillagrillar, i stora gäng. Hanarna känns igen på sitt tuppliknande läte och rödprickiga ansikte där jakten på den mest IQ-befriade tjejen börjar med att spela upp sin senaste ringsignal på mobilen. Honorna känns igen på sina översminkade, konstgjorda utseenden och rosa stringtros
som hänger strax under armhålorna. Byxor i barnstorlekar är ofta vanligt. Fjortisen kan upplevas som ett mycket störande djur då de under sin vandring genom samhället kan utstöta sig höga parningsläten. Ofta i form av svordomar så som t.ex: Tönt. Hora osv. Antalet av dessa djur har ökat markant på senare tid vilket har lett till en het diskussion om det är möjligt att börja skjuta delar av populationen.
Everyone likes children, so when a person says, 'I LIKE CHILDREN,' it isn't really that creepy, but when we get into specifics like, 'I LIKE 10 YEAR OLDS,' that's where we draw the line.
Folk som åker i fängelse är inte bara förbrytare - de är definitionsmässigt förbrytare som har misslyckats.
Det finns fyra slags mord; brottsliga, ursäktliga, rättvisa och berömvärda. Denna klassificering tjänar juristerna. För de mördade är den likgiltig.
-hahaha that's very cute. You look like a match selling girl.
- Ahh, the ones that light houses on fire right?
- No.
- Hey, what are you doing?
- Shh, I'm up to somthing big
- Tailing cops inside a police station?
- ....
"The power of accurate observation is often
called cynicism by those who have not got it."
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
"You want sympathy? You'll find it between "shit" and "syphilis" in the dictionary."
The most honorable way for a vampire to die is to go sky diving, land on a cow, fall off the cow, and impale himself on the wooden fencepost.
Image position
How to make a nice presentation
Choose photo
Choose one of your photos, preferably one depicting yourself or that describes you. Adjust the image position with the tools in the next step. If you want to change to photo for another one, use the image icon in the bottom left corner.
Write a text
What is interesting to know about you? To change to style of the text, click the text icon in the bottom left corner. If you change the color and the text is hard to read you can give it a put a white faded background.
My latest photos
Visa toppen
Show footer