August
Thursday 20 September 2018 photo 3/5
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The Big Tits Dragon Tamil Dubbed Movie Torrent
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DOWNLOAD: http://urllio.com/r6eqn
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A medieval Book of the Dead is discovered in the catacombs that run under a small town strip club. When one of the desperate strippers raises an army of the undead, the rest of the strippers must kick zombie ass to save the world. This movie stars several known faces from Japan's adult movie industry, most notably Sora Aoi.
Absolutely dismal attempt to make something resembling a horror comedy, like only the Japanese in their sick psycho minds could produce (any Japanese people that have seen this thing would indubitably concur with me in that last bigotry ridden statement). Easily one of the worst films I've ever seen, which unfortunately even ended up in my movie collection (I never knew my friends disliked me so much they would give me this monstrosity for my birthday... but at least I didn't pay for it, except for the ten years it took away from my life by giving me brain rot). Except for a few nice naked breasts sparsely displayed throughout, there's just nothing redeemable about this audiovisual piece of poo that by rights shouldn't even be allowed to be called a movie, since that would insult anyone who's ever worked on proper films. The plot, if there is such a thing here, revolves around a few exotic dancers (a bunch of girls with hardly any acting experience, which is clearly revealed) who find themselves under siege by completely unconvincing looking zombies (my cat's fleas could have provided better make-up effects!) after discovering some old book containing incantations capable of resurrecting the dead. Every supposed joke the brainless mutants called 'writers' make misses its mark completely, making this movie so painfully cringe worthy this flick is very hard to sit through, even though it's running for only 74 minutes. To make matters worse – yes, that is actually possible – the movie boasts 3D effects: every time an icon pops up in the corner of the screen, you can put on your 3D glasses, but what is seen when wearing these is not 3D, it's just jumbled, messed up imagery, inducing nasty headaches within seconds. Depth is obviously non-existent in every way here, it might as well be called a 0D movie. If there ever is such a thing as a public movie burning rally somewhere, this is the title you're most likely to see in agony on the bon fire; I'd be first in line to make sure no copies of this horrific pile of garbage survive the event. Original Japanese title: Kyonyȗ Doragon: Onsen zonbi vs sutorippȃ 5: if there's indeed a part 1 through 4 of this (I never bothered finding this out), watching the series in a marathon is nothing short of committing seppuku, the dishonorable version.
First of all, I must say that whomever came up with this title for a movie should be applauded, what a deviant movie title; "Big Tits Zombie", though the Japanese title is "Kyonyû doragon: Onsen zonbi vs sutorippâ 5"). So this movie outright appeals to most men. However, I will say that the reason why I bought it from Amazon was because it was a zombie movie and because it was a Japanese produced zombie movie, those movies usually tend to be so bad that they are actually funny and enjoyable.
And this movie was no different. Sure, it was mostly focused on showing off pretty women and their breasts (yeah, hence the name of the movie), but despite this sleazy approach, then the movie was still fun to watch.
The story? Well forget about that, because there is almost no story going on here. The story is a side dish, so to speak, or at least it was for me. I was too busy laughing at the extremities of the zombies and the effects. There was a story, though, about a group of exotic dancers coming to stumble over a collection of occult and vile relics in the basement of their club, and accidentally unleash a wave of ravenous zombies upon the world.
As for the zombies, well, they just cracked me up. I loved how almost all of them were dressed in outrageous, abnormal outfits that you would not see people wear at all anywhere. But it worked out well, because it brought a nice sense of comedy and weird twist to the movie. And for some reason, then in all Japanese zombie movies, the dead people (zombies) turn to a very strange shade of grey when they die, and for some odd reason, it is always only the face that turns grey, the rest of the body remains the normal skin color. I find that hilarious, and it always cracks me up.
The effects in "Big Tits Zombie" were questionable at best, but that was part of the charm, because there was a thorough all-out Amateur touch to the movie. Don't get me wrong, because I mean that in the best way possible. It was such a pleasure to see a low budget movie of this type turning out to be this enjoyable. There was even scenes where you could see the wires holding up various tendrils in some scenes, and it was so painstakingly obvious. I had to rewind for that scene twice, just to see it again, because it was so funny; it was so amazingly fake and bad (but in a good way).
Having an almost all-women cast, "Big Tits Zombie" is of course all about showing off skin and pretty women. And true enough, there is a lot of scantily dressed women in the movie, and of course the obligatory nudeness (check the title of the movie again, if you are in doubt why this was necessary). Personally, then I thought that Sola Aoi (playing Lena Jodo) and Mari Sakurai (playing Maria) were the ones who carried the most weight of the movie.
There was one scene that was so extreme that I almost didn't believe that I saw it. I will not give away what it is here, because you have to see it yourself, but I will give you this much, so you know what to keep a look for and wait for; Nene has been bitten by a zombie and is on bed turning into a zombie, then she does this back arch, and then...
"Big Tits Zombie" is a zombie comedy, so think a Japanese version of "Shaun of the Dead" gone awry, and with a smaller budget. But with that in mind, don't let that scare you off. If you are a zombie aficionado like me and enjoy Asian movies, then give "Big Tits Zombie" a go, because it is so outrageously extreme that it might just entertain you. I know I was laughing a lot throughout the movie.
And as a side note, I just read on the back of the DVD cover that Sola Aoi (playing Lena) and Risa Kasumi (playing Ginko) are Japanese adult stars, so that just makes the movie even more absurdly extreme!
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