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Dear Reflection: I Never Meant to be a Rebel (The Bell Collection)
by Jessica Bell
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Jessica Bell never meant to be a rebel. But growing up with two gothic rockers as parents seemed to make it inevitable.
In 1980s Australia, Erika Bach and Demetri Vlass founded Ape the Cry and Hard Candy, two of Melbourne’s iconic indie bands. They encouraged Jessica with unreserved love to pick up the guitar and write her own songs. But Erika’s back problem became a nightmare of pill popping, alcohol abuse, and anxiety attacks. Demetri retreated into silence for fear of triggering Erika’s drug-induced psychosis. And Jessica turned inwards, to her own reflection.
But her mirror self was a fiend, not a friend. All it took was one secret drink at fifteen, and Jessica dove headlong into depression and self-destruction to escape the madness at home.
Experimenting with bisexuality in a high school rife with bullies? Not a problem; she had alcohol. Losing her virginity to rape? Not a problem; she had alcohol. Trying to supplement absent love with unprotected one-night stands? Not a problem; she had alcohol ...
Until one day alcohol nearly drove Jessica off a cliff.
Jessica had to look at herself honestly and frankly. Why did she keep running from reality, and more importantly, herself?
Dear Reflection: I Never Meant to be a Rebel (The Bell Collection) Jessica Bell
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Losing her virginity to rape? Not a problem; she had alcoholI despised school, so I would often pretend I was sickMaybe I knew we weren't really going to leave.We didn't.Through the many fights, and broken love between my parents, I would soon understand that choices didn't have to be permanent, nor did anyone have to keep promises if they didn't want to.That night Mum tucked me into bed, as she always did, stroking my hair and telling me how much she loved meMany children who bear the brunt of 'caring' for parents, are forced into an adult role, and their voices are rarely heardI decided it would be best to pretend everything was okay as I wanted to appear strong and able to take care of myself, but I hadn't yet mastered the artIt was so fun! And every time I visited them, I'd ask to play shopI think it started with D.Mum walked over to him, grabbed him by his school bag and spun him around to face herThe back of my head rammed into a bag hook and made my teeth bang together
How to Be Jason Bourne: Multiple Passports, Swiss Banking, and Crossing BordersPost navigation Previous Previous post: The Flash vol 2 (rebirth) Search Search for: Search Text Widget This is a text widget, which allows you to add text or HTML to your sidebarBell shares an intense tale of overcoming a deep depression that gripped her as a young child, and clung on to her into adulthood, with unrestrained emotional honesty and guts." Samantha Vrant, author of SEVEN LETTERS FROM PARIS******"A memoir for anyone who has ever felt aloneBut I can't remember many of those momentsIt was comforting and made me feel at homeBut I couldn't stop the guilt"What did you say?" I said."I told him if he touched you again I would pull his little penis off."That made me giggleAnd I would always be the shop assistant, and never the customerView and read Dear Reflection I Never Meant To Be A Rebel The Bell Collection Download Epub Mobi Pdf Fb2 pdf ebook free online before you decide to download by clicking Read and Download buttonThe voice in my head had hushed
I'd asked her to bake, I'm sure of itShe wasn't the baking type, but she made macaroons, or WHICH ME WOULD YOU LIKE TO MEET? The Writing & Publishing Coach/Speaker The Novelist & Memoirist The Poet & Short Story Writer The Musician The Book Cover Designer Sign up to my newsletter.Connect with me online:FacebookTwitter Instagram Soundcloud YouTube BandcampJessica's other websites:Vine Leaves PressHow to Self-Publish Your BookSelf-Publishing MasterclassWriting Day WorkshopsThe Artist Unleashed Dear Reflection: I Never Meant to be a RebelA MemoirAustralian Book PR DIY PR Guide Press Releases About Contact Australian Book PR DIY PR Guide Press Releases About Contact Noble Words Dear Reflection: I Never Meant to Be a Rebel by Jessica Bell 860 post-template-default,single,single-post,postid-860,single-format-standard,ajaxfade,pagenotloaded,,qode-title-hidden,qodegrid1300,footerresponsiveadv,qode-content-sidebar-responsive,qode-theme-ver-11.0,qode-theme-bridge,wpb-js-composer js-comp-ver-5.1.1,vcresponsive 25 May Dear Reflection: I Never Meant to Be a Rebel by Jessica Bell Posted at 16:17h in Press Releases by Emma Noble 0 Comments Jessica Bell never meant to be a rebelEnjoy reading free Dear Reflection I Never Meant To Be A Rebel The Bell Collection Download Epub Mobi Pdf Fb2 pdf ebooks online now 2016 (122) December (6) November (9) October (3) September (10) August (6) July (14) June (13) May (9) April (15) March (13) February (12) January (12) Why did she keep running from reality, and more importantly& herself? Because my parents were creative, they encouraged me to be creative too
Excerpted by permission of Vine Leaves PressJessica had to look at herself honestly and franklyThe thrill of obtaining such privacy would soon develop into a cold, selfish, heartless reflection I believed protected me.She persuaded me to run.Her voice grew more authoritative until she became 'another me' a decision maker who knew 'best.'She didn't.* * *I sat on Mum's bed, watching her pack a suitcase for us bothJessica Bell never meant to be a rebelNow, I only remember him saying "Not now."The luxury of playing shop with Tony and Margaret only occurred a couple of times a month, if that, and it wasn't long before I learnt to enjoy playing aloneI returned to bed and wrapped myself in my feather down doona, shivering until I warmed.The next day, when my mother, Erika Bach, and stepfather, Demetri Vlass, were preoccupied with recording their song ideas onto their four-track mixer in the music room, they didn't notice a thingThey encouraged Jessica with unreserved love to pick up the guitar and write her own songsa stupid stupid stupid idiot! * * *I grabbed my school bag off my allocated hook and skipped down the school corridor past the principal's office to the exit onto Cape Street in HeidelbergJessica Bell is clearly talented and I personally am going to look for some of her other workDemetri and I laughed so hard.I scooped the wet Milo up with a teaspoon and ate it, then drank the milk left in the glass and put it in the sink 171bf2437f
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