Tuesday 30 June 2015 photo 1/1
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Another night; another attack.
You tell yourself to be strong but the words fail you.
The tears do not have time to dry on your cheeks because they keep coming.
You scream at the top of your lungs for someone to hear you, to help you, but not a word comes out.
So you stay in your room. Alone, wishing you were someone else, somwhere else or not at all.
3000 thougts at once and you can't tackle them all, so you sit there, numb. The pillow is soaked by your tears by the time you are finally calm enough to fall asleep, but even in your dreams it haunts you; the feeling of disapointment, failure, uglyness, pressure.
You wake up the next morning, head and chest hurting from crying. You plaster on that smile that everyone around you are used to seeing.
"How are you?"
"I'm fine."
It follows you around all day long. When something goes wrong, even the smallest thing like dropping your pen, it swallows you whole. Washes over you like a wave as you struggle to get back to shore.
You give up, you stop swimming and lets the water drag you along its path. You think "Is this the way out?" as you take one last breath and sink under the water to never come back up again.
Depression won.
You tell yourself to be strong but the words fail you.
The tears do not have time to dry on your cheeks because they keep coming.
You scream at the top of your lungs for someone to hear you, to help you, but not a word comes out.
So you stay in your room. Alone, wishing you were someone else, somwhere else or not at all.
3000 thougts at once and you can't tackle them all, so you sit there, numb. The pillow is soaked by your tears by the time you are finally calm enough to fall asleep, but even in your dreams it haunts you; the feeling of disapointment, failure, uglyness, pressure.
You wake up the next morning, head and chest hurting from crying. You plaster on that smile that everyone around you are used to seeing.
"How are you?"
"I'm fine."
It follows you around all day long. When something goes wrong, even the smallest thing like dropping your pen, it swallows you whole. Washes over you like a wave as you struggle to get back to shore.
You give up, you stop swimming and lets the water drag you along its path. You think "Is this the way out?" as you take one last breath and sink under the water to never come back up again.
Depression won.