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I had a mental breakdown today..
I thought about suicide for a while..

I sat there on that stool..
But I saw and smiled to someone..
She smiled back to me..

We threw those balloons to eachother and smiled..
She didn't see my pain..
I wouldn't let her..

When she went, I got quite..
No one threw balloons to me anymore..
Well not so that I noticed..

I got more and more withdrawn..
In the end, I rushed outside..
I couldn't stay anymore..

My fever went down and my illness died..
I stood there and thought about what the others would think..
I didn't tell them why..

They sat in there and had fun..
They didn't need me in there..
I wanted to go home..
But a friend persuaded me not to..



That is the view I had on that party..
Big fun, is it not?
Somehow, that was the best party I've ever been to.....

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Anonymous Thu 4 Dec 2008 18:57

I love you, my friend. It's sad that you are depressed again :'(

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Thulousis Thu 4 Dec 2008 18:58

Again? I'm always depressed.. I just don't show it to anyone.. I may have some breakdowns but that doesn't mean I get depressed..

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Anonymous Thu 13 Nov 2008 20:52

Would you like to know who I am? Do you want to even discuss things with me that I so badly want someone to listen to ..? You and I are more alike than you think ....

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Thulousis Thu 13 Nov 2008 20:53

Please, tell me who you are.. That will put my mind to ease.. We can discuss whatever you need to discuss.. I promise..

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Anonymous Tue 11 Nov 2008 23:17

You are a very strange person, I think. Officials at the same time, you are interesting. Should I continue to be a secret person for you? Have studied your diary here on the sly. You do not know who I am, it may probably remain so ..

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Thulousis Tue 11 Nov 2008 23:18

Please, don't be secret for me.. Tell me who you are and you might even get to know me better if you want..
Please..

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Angeru Tue 4 Nov 2008 23:20

It shows courage to stick outside. What you did wasn't wrong in any consideration, but the one who put you in that party should've warned both you and me about alcohol being a part of the fun.

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